So what’s a personal blogger to do? (Gah, I just internally cringed at calling myself that. One post a month does not a blogger make, young lady.) I’ve come to the conclusion that I can’t keep holding things in. So, I’m going to try to open up more, and see where this takes me. I definitely won’t be sharing everything here — I do want to keep at least some aspect of my private life private — but I think that sharing, talking, ranting, even confessing — will help me more in the long run than keeping quiet for fear of upsetting anyone else.
A few years ago, I spent a lot of time around Yahoo — in chat rooms (cringe) and on message boards, and on their first foray into the social media world and blogging platforms. I wrote about anything and everything. I shared my thoughts and goals, the minutiae of my everyday comings and goings, and my opinions on everything from pop culture to whether or not you should wear pajama bottoms to the grocery store.
By the way? No, you shouldn’t. Put some real damn pants on, you lazy so-and-so.
The thing was, all that stuff I wrote? I was sharing with people I knew only from the internet. The few dozen or so faceless people I interacted with, that I considered friends, but had never actually met in person. These people knew a different side of me, a side I was a little afraid to share with my “real” friends, or family or coworkers. So, in my mind at least, it was almost as though what I was writing was safe. Safe from comment or derision, opinion, and most of all, repercussion.
I’m of two minds about what to share here anymore. I have things to talk about and to get off my chest, things that bother me and things I’d love to shout from the rooftops. But I know the things I say here aren’t always safe to share, because you’re not all faceless people from the internet. Many of the people that read this little blog are people that know me in person — friends and coworkers, even family, and I’m afraid what I say might be misconstrued or cause hurt feelings, when most of what I would say wouldn’t be more than just a way to get things off my chest, to open up, to air out my thoughts and vent my frustrations.