Posted in Cocktail Friday, daily, drinks, recipe

Cocktail Friday: Guinness, Jameson, and Bailey’s Milkshake

I’m a terrible person. There’s no excuse for this.

Really.

You shouldn’t make this. Unless you want to plant your ass on the couch for the rest of the night after drinking it, because that’s what happened to me. LETHAL.

There was a time I could have drank three or four of the…ahem…”beverages” this milkshake is based on (I won’t call them by their name, because it’s considered offensive in more polite circles) and functioned perfectly fine for the rest of the night.

Those days are gone, APPARENTLY. Shameful.

Guinness, Jameson, and Bailey’s Milkshake 

  • 2 cups vanilla ice cream
  • 4 oz Guinness (Or any other stout you prefer, would be delicious with a craft/bourbon aged version)
  • 1 oz Whiskey
  • 1 oz Irish Cream liquor
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract

Add all ingredients to a blender and mix. Add more ice cream if you prefer a thicker shake, or a little milk if you want it thinner. Pour into a glass and serve.

Then collapse face down on the couch when you’re done drinking it.

Posted in Cocktail Friday, daily, drinks, recipe

Cocktail Friday: Drunk Arnold Palmer

This drink started out the same way as many do – take a refreshing non-alcoholic beverage and say, “You know what would make this better? BOOZE.”

I loved Arnold Palmers before I knew that’s what they were called. Half Iced tea, half lemonade, all tasty. Tart, sweet, and refreshing, it’s perfect for a lazy late summer afternoon. When you add whiskey? Even better.

You can make this drink according to your own level of taste/laziness/time availability. Make it all from scratch, buy the tea and lemonade pre-made, buy powered mixes for one or the other or both (though that might be a tad too sweet), or do a combination of any of the above.

For this one, I decided on the scratch method all the way. I started with a batch of sun tea. Pour four cups of water into a pitcher, add twelve tea bags, and set the pitcher outside in the sun for a good hour. Remove the tea bags (squeeze the excess water out), add four more cups of water, and refrigerate.

I didn’t make an entire pitcher of lemonade in deference to the lack of available space in my refrigerator, so I just made a small amount in my shaker before adding my tea. Pour 2 oz lemon juice in a shaker, followed by the same amount of cold water. Stir in 1 TB simple syrup (more if you like it sweet). Follow with 4 oz iced tea. Add 1-2 oz Honey Whiskey (or any whiskey you prefer) and ice. Shake for a few seconds, pour and serve.

Drunk Arnold Palmer

  • 4 oz iced tea
  • 4 oz lemonade
  • 1 Tb simple syrup (or to taste)
  • 1-2 oz Jack Daniel’s Honey Whiskey

Pour all ingredients into a shaker, add ice. Shake, pour, and serve.

It’s obviously easier to just make one pitcher each of lemonade and iced tea and make each drink as needed. Or you could make an entire pitcher of these at once. Just be sure my invite doesn’t get lost in the mail.

Posted in Cocktail Friday, daily, drinks, recipe

Cocktail Friday: Blackberry “Caipirinha”

I learned a valuable lesson working on this recipe.

Rum hits me pretty goddamn hard.

I’ve got quite a bit of a low tolerance level, but I’m usually good for one to one and a half drinks. Not so with this sucker. Halfway through, and I was all, “Woah.”

No telling if it’s because of the brand of rum or just rum itself, but lesson learned.

My dad introduced me to caipirinhas a few years ago, when my parents and I were lounging out by their pool. He brought out this delicious looking cocktail with muddled limes, simple syrup, and rum, and I (mistakenly) said, “Oooh! Did you make mojitos?”

He GLARED at me.

“Mojitos are for pendejos, Jennifer. This is a caipirinha. It’s better than a mojito.”

The caipirinhas my dad makes are not the traditional Brazilian version. Mostly because it’s not easy to find Brazilian cachaça in Pennsylvania. So we use rum. Bacardi, of course. Because PUERTO RICO.

Blackberry Caipirinha

  • 2 oz. White Rum
  • 1-2 oz. Simple Syrup (to taste)
  • 1 oz Lime Juice
  • 6 Fresh Blackberries
  • Crushed Ice

Squeeze lime juice into a rocks glass. Add fresh berries and simple syrup. Crush with a muddler or the back of a spoon a few times to break up the berries. Add rum. Fill glass with ice. Stir and serve.

Because Daddy says mojitos are for pendejos. (But I’ll still probably make one soon.)

Posted in Cocktail Friday, daily, drinks, recipe

Cocktail Friday: Watermelon Margarita

You guys. I’m writing this on Tuesday, and let me tell you, it has been one hell of a week already. Which is why I’m glad I work ahead on these posts, because I needed this one tonight. And yes, I’m aware I’m a bit behind on National Tequila Day, but you know. Better late than sober.

This margarita. Oh, goodness. It’s so tasty. It’s not too tart, not too sweet, and gets you just the right amount of tipsy. The only thing that would have made this better was a big old bowl of chips and queso.

OOOH. QUESO.

Watermelon Margarita

  • 11/2-2 cups seedless watermelon, cubed
  • 2 oz silver tequila (Patron, 1800, or don’t talk to me.)
  • 1 oz Cointreau
  • 1 oz lime juice

Puree the watermelon in a blender and strain it with a fine mesh sieve. Set aside.

Fill a tumbler with ice. Add tequila, cointreau, lime juice, and watermelon puree (you likely won’t use it all). Stir. Serve.

Yes, you could throw all of this back in the blender for a frozen version. And yes, you could rim the glass with lime juice and dip it in salt before pouring the drink. But why would you *want* to?

Posted in Cocktail Friday, daily, drinks, recipe

Cocktail Friday: Dirty Shirley Temple

While I was growing up in the Pocono Mountains, there weren’t a lot of different restaurants my family chose to go to whenever we wanted a nice meal. Hell, there weren’t a lot of restaurants, period. (Cut to 30 years later, when you can’t walk three steps without hitting yet another fast-casual chain, but I digress.) But there was one restaurant my family went to when there was something to celebrate, or we just wanted something besides a diner. I’m not sure if the restaurant had an official name, we just called it the Motel In Town, because that’s where it was.

At the Motel. In the town of Stroudsburg. We’re an uncomplicated bunch, from Monroe County.

This was my parents’ favorite restaurant in the area for years – a place where my mom could get a lobster tail, my dad could get a steak or some crab cakes, where I always ordered a plate of steamed clams because I liked to keep the shells (I was a weird kid, guys), and I always, always ordered a Shirley Temple, because I loved the idea of being able to order a “fancy” drink in a restaurant just like a grown up. I never knew that it was just Sprite with a cherry flavored syrup. I just knew it was pretty and came with fruit skewered by a plastic sword.

All these years later, I’ve had my share of “fancy” (and not-so-fancy) drinks, from the questionable malt beverages of my pre-legal years, to the Malibu Bay Breezes of my mid twenties to my now-usual order of Jack and Coke (or Ginger, in the summer), but I never thought to update my beloved Shirley to a more “adult” beverage until about two years ago.

This cocktail is the opposite of fancy. It calls for sugary soda and flavored vodka. It is horribly unsophisticated.

You know what else it is? Effective. This, my friends, is how I get what is called “White Girl Wasted”. It’s my go-to drink on game night, my Friday night stress reliever, and one of my favorite summer refreshments.

Dirty Shirley Temple

  • 1 oz Cherry Flavored Vodka
  • 8 oz Lemon Lime Soda
  • 1/2 oz Grenadine
  • Maraschino Cherries
  • Ice

Fill a tall glass with ice, crushed or whole. Add 1 oz. cherry flavored vodka. Fill with lemon-lime soda. Float 1/2 oz grenadine on top. Garnish with maraschino cherries and serve.

Tiny plastic sword optional.

Posted in Cocktail Friday, daily, drinks, recipe

Cocktail Friday: Bourbon Lavender Lemonade

A couple of months back I took a day trip with a friend to Asbury Park, NJ. It was a gorgeous spring day and we were able to do a little shopping, a little sight seeing (I’ve never been to Asbury Park but Sara was a regular visitor back in the day so she gave me a tour and a little history lesson), and we saw a great music act perform Amy Winehouse’s Back to Black album with a 25-person orchestra in an old school bowling alley. Complete with tiki bar!

Before the show, however, we stopped in one of the numerous restaurants in town for dinner and a cocktail. Being a whiskey and/or bourbon kind of girl, I decided to order their lavender bourbon lemonade, which was so tasty and such the perfect summer cocktail that I knew I would have to re-create it at home, post haste.

So I did.

Start by making a lavender simple syrup. Stir 1 cup of sugar into 1 cup of water over medium to medium-high heat on the stove top and simmer until the sugar is dissolved and the mixture is slightly thickened. Remove from heat, add 1 tsp of dried lavender and allow to cool. Strain lavender from the simple syrup and set aside (store covered in refrigerator for up to a month).

For the drink: Run a lemon quarter around the rim of a rocks glass and dip in sugar (I used granulated sugar today, next time I will perhaps use Turbinado sugar, mainly for aesthetics). Fill glass with crushed ice. Add lemon juice, lavender syrup, bourbon, and stir.

Sip while sitting on the patio and watch the evening go by.

Bourbon Lavender Lemonade

1 oz. fresh squeezed lemon juice

1-1.5 oz. lavender simple syrup (see instructions above)

2 oz. Bourbon (Maker’s Mark or Knob Creek preferred)

Fresh lemon, cut in quarters

Sugar for rim of glass

Run a lemon around the rim of a rocks glass, dip in sugar. Fill glass with crushed ice. Add lemon juice, simple syrup, and bourbon. Stir and serve.

Enjoy, guys.